In English Voices From Spain

The culprit of it all

Published originally in Spanish. Ramón de España. Crónica Global

We hadn’t heard for some time of that adorable elderly couple that are Jordi Pujol and Marta Ferrusola when a photograph of both of them voting on last Sunday became a reminder that they were still alive and kicking. In the so-called polling station nobody insulted them nor reminded them that they were Beagle Boys that have spent their life milking their homeland for their own benefit; nobody remembered that one of them evaded taxes while creating the mafia-like scheme of 3%, while the other raised a litter of financial delinquents. They were treated as what they were, Fathers of the Nation.

This Catalonia that we are now enjoying was invented by them almost four decades ago. The Pujol motto was, as we all know, “primer paciencia, després independència” (“first patience, then independence”). His lot was patience, while his most recent successor’s was independence. In his condition as visionary and principal maker of the little country that we now have –assisted by short-sighted Spanish presidents- he went to vote with the satisfaction of a duty fulfilled: Catalonia was already split in two and hatred of the neighbor was masked as good old democracy. Mission accomplished, Mr. Pujol! The Catalonia you dreamed of has become a reality. That was cunning, unlike poor Artur Mas.

Y es que esta Cataluña que ahora disfrutamos se la inventaron ellos hace casi cuatro décadas. El lema de Pujol era, como todos sabemos, primer paciencia, després independència. A él le tocó la paciencia y a su más reciente sucesor, la independencia. Y en su condición de visionario y principal fabricante del paisito que ahora tenemos –ayudado por presidentes españoles miopes y cortoplacistas–, fue a votar con la satisfacción del deber cumplido: Cataluña ya está partida en dos y el odio al vecino se disfraza de democracia de la buena. ¡Misión cumplida, señor Pujol! La Cataluña con la que usted soñaba ya existe. Lo suyo sí ha sido astucia y no lo del pobre Artur Mas.

Independence was not only an old longing, for the Pujol family it was also the shortest path for impunity. The secessionist have already stated that an amnesty will be declared for all the thieves with an patriotic excuse, whose evil deeds would be forgotten for the greater good of concord between the oppressed. There is another powerful reason for the Pujol couple to vote, despite how old and ailing they might be: they are concerned about the future of their children, and given the choice between going to jail and keeping on stealing in the name of Catalonia, there can be no doubt. The announced amnesty would also benefit Artur Mas, Quico Homs and maybe even the Mossos’ head Trapero, since we all are Catalonians and between fellow countrymen there shouldn’t be quarrels on such puny details as money, corruption or servilism, should there?

Some of us regret that the main responsable of the current Catalonia is both a moral and actual swindler that got away with it due to the complicity, apathy or stupidity of their contemporaries. But nobody cares about our opinion since we are not even considered true Catalonians: the current Catalonia, as everybody knows, is binary and split between secessionists and fascists.

 

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